I would like to discuss a book I recently read about emotional abuse called, A Journey through Emotional Abuse: From Bondage to Freedom by Caroline Abbott with Debbie Stafford.
This book should be recommended reading for anyone in an abusive relationship, who has been in one, knows someone who is in one, and for domestic violence organizations to have in their libraries. A Journey through Emotional Abuse is written for Christians who have many questions about how the bible relates to their marriage. The author, Caroline Abbott, takes bible verses, and breaks them down so the reader can understand them and how they relate to their relationship. She explains the church’s views on emotional abuse and divorce for an abused wife.
Ms. Abbott breaks the book down into several sections, including protecting the children, discussing change, turning to the Church for help, deciding to leave, preparing for court, and finding joy after separation. I’ll touch on a few here. The book explains the following:
- Domestic violence terms and the cycle of abuse. Women are able to ascertain if they are in an abusive relationship because of the valuable information the author provides.
- What type of man abuses his wife? One predictor of abuse is the sense of entitlement. Abuse is all about control. The abuser knows the abuse hurts the wife, but he wants to control her. There is no respect in the relationship.
- Makes sense of biblical verses and explains what God wants for the abused wife. Also, discusses turning to the Church for help and talking to people in the Church to see if they will be supportive. Discusses how friends will react if you leave the marriage. She discusses the wedding vows and points out the abuser breaks the promise when he abuses.
- Explains the effects of children in an abusive marriage. A list of some of the effects of raising children in an abusive home are on pages 50-51. It is important to show children what a respectful relationship looks like.
- Deciding to stay or leave and preparing for legal issues and how to develop a safety plan.
- Finding happiness after leaving and starting a new life.
This book also has resources, websites, and recommended books that are very helpful to an abused woman and her support system. Click here to visit her website and here to buy her book. You can also buy it on Amazon.
I highly recommend this thoughtful, resourceful, and Christian book and feel it can be very helpful to a woman in an abusive relationship.
Remember, if we can help just one woman, we’ve done our job.